MLB Adapts Shirts VS Skins After Milverine’s Glorious Chest Hair Boosts Ratings

MILWAUKEE – After local legend Milverine threw out the first pitch at last night’s Brewers game, the MLB knew they had the answer to this season’s slump in viewership. “It’s a simple formula, shirts verses skins, just like gym class”. “After seeing Milverine’s sweat glistened chest hair in 4k high definition, we knew we had the secret ingredient to boost the numbers” stated MLB commissioner Rob Manfred. 

The rule change Starts next Monday and it will consist of the Home team wearing jerseys and the away team not. Numbers will be sprayed on the backs of the shirtless players and will be reapplied if needed if it’s a hot day out. The rule will extend through the regular season, but may revert back for the playoffs, because no one wants to stare at erect man nipples in the fall.