Admirals Sign Free Agent Russian Battleship In Preparation For Calder Cup Playoffs

MILWAUKEE, WI – Inching closer and closer to the Calder Cup Playoffs and well beyond the AHL trade deadline, the Admirals have had to get creative to push them over the edge to glory.

 At this morning’s press briefing, Admirals PR director George Stanislawski announced the signing with great enthusiasm.

 “RFS Pyotr Velikiy will provide us the absolute stonewall defense we need to advance us and focus solely on scoring goals and taking the ‘ship.”

 “While he’s got a slightly questionable record of bombing beyond his team’s top line, we hope to control his aggressive and enforcer-style profile.”

While he won’t be available for the final regular season game due to some eligibility concerns over war crimes misconduct, the team expects to have him ready for game one, which is soon to be announced.

Go Ads!