Why I’m Never Allowed Back At Becher Meats

WEST ALLIS – In the enchanting town of West Allis, Wisconsin, sits a small butchers shop nestled on the corner of 68th Street and Becher Street. Beat-Yer-Meats has been a staple of the West Allis community since 2018 carrying a variety of  wieners, rubs, and enough breasts to satiate even the hungriest of men. All while bearing a name that’s just so inviting.

For those who aren’t from around these parts. Becher street is named after J.A. Becher, a prominent real estate developer who came to Milwaukee from Germany in the 1850s. Contrary to popular belief it’s not pronounced Beeker, or Becker. It’s Beach-er..  

Explaining my confusion with the police outside proved fruitless, as I am now a registered sex offender. Still, this all pales in comparison to the pain I feel from no longer being able to eat any of the fabulous products available at Becher Meats. 

If anyone is available this Saturday from 12pm-3pm, I need help moving. They say I live too close to Jefferson Elementary School. Pizza and beer will be provided.