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America Praised For Its Diversity Among Wealthy Pedophiles

UNITED STATES – Americans celebrated a victory today as the United Nations awarded their country with the “Excellence in Pedophile Diversity” award after rapper Diddy, a black man, had his properties raided under suspicion of child sex trafficking. 

This newfound pedophilia in the wealthy black community comes after years of focus on billionaire Jeffrey Epstein, a white man, and his famous child sex trafficking ring.

The Excellence in Pedophile Diversity Award will be officially presented at the White House on Friday where several former presidents will be in attendance.

“I’m glad we finally got some blacks in the mix,” explained former President Bill Clinton. “These kids can really get sick of us rich white guys. Diddy’s my boy, and by that I mean I’ve been knowing him since he was six. He’s a great man, and these kids deserve him.”

Former president Trump also chimed in on the issue, posting on Truth Social that Diddy is “quite a guy,” and “if it hadn’t been for my presidency we wouldn’t have such diversity in our pedophiles…THAT’S WHY I’M WINNING BLACK VOTERS LEFT AND RIGHT.”

Another diversity hire in the pedophile community, Gislaine Maxwell, was unavailable for comment, but she did mention that her prison time is going well, despite the lack of minors.

Skyy Davenport

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