WISN12 Mark Baden Commits Seppuku Live On Air After Failing To Predict Shower

MILWAUKEE,WI – In a grisly display of self-inflicted punishment, WISN12 Weather Watch’s beloved weatherman Mark Baden took to the airwaves and committed Seppuku yesterday evening, a form of Japanese ritualized suicide.

Baden made it clear that he was making public amends for failing to predict brief, light storms which blew over the area earlier that afternoon.

Prior to impaling himself with a shortsword, Baden stated, “I hope I can return honor to the WISN12 house and to the Baden name.” He then stuck the weapon into his belly, pulled it across his abdomen and twisted it, ensuring a fatal wound.

Representatives from WISN12 claimed Baden initially requested to commit self-immolation. However, that was deemed an in-studio fire hazard.

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