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Beyond Thunder-Loan: Biden Proposes Cage Matches For Student Loan Forgiveness

Washington DC- “Two students enter, one leaves debt free.” That was the message from President Biden today at a press conference held on the White House’s rose lawn. Biden pitched his next phase of student loan relief today, with a model some see as an olive branch to moderate republicans. Under this new program dubbed, “Beyond Thunder-loan”, students will compete one on one in unrestricted cage matches, with the victor receiving up to $10,000 in student loan forgiveness.

Biden told reporters, “This new program empowers our sons and daughters to accelerate their financial and professional goals by throwing off the burden of these predatory loans in a forum that brings joy and excitement to their communities. Everyone wins”.

Details of the new program are still developing, and each state’s department of education will be responsible for implementation. The Wisconsin Department of Education has already received more than 25,000 registrations for the program.

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