NIAGRA, WI – I was on my way back from a rock hunting trip in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula when I thought I’d be a nice guy and ask my friends if they wanted anything from one of the countless dispensaries. Since weed is still illegal in Wisconsin it’s definitely a way to score some cool points with the boys. They sent me the money and by the time I put everything in my car I had enough green to put Willy Nelson on his ass.
As I crossed the Michigan/Wisconsin border to make my way back home the unthinkable happened. I got rolled. The cop sat in his car behind me for a whole ten minutes before walking up to my window. I contemplated taking one of the edibles to calm my nerves as I waited, but that time had passed.
He gave my car one good sniff before asking me to step out of the vehicle so it could be searched. It didn’t take him long to find the stash directly on the passenger seat and I knew I was in trouble.
I don’t remember the officer’s name but he offered me a choice, either go to jail for transporting illicit drugs across state lines, or smoke it all at the border. I knew what had to be done. Doink after doink I powered my way through the stash. By the time I had polished off the last pre-roll I was the highest I had ever been.
He tossed me my keys because he knew driving absolutely zonked is better than driving drunk.
I haven’t told the homies that I smoked the entire stash yet but I don’t feel like it’s my responsibility to pay them back for something that wasn’t my fault.