MILWAUKEE – After days of growing suspicion, the Milwaukee Police Department confirmed that Oscar Mayer’s beloved Weinermobile is definitely parked outside your mom’s house. Wisconsin News Today was on the scene as Mayor Cavalier Johnson and Chief of Police Jeffrey B. Norman gave a joint press conference on Monday, October 30th.
A source, who spoke on condition of anonymity, told WNT that a tie was also present on the home’s front door knob, suggesting to authorities that the Weinermobile may be parked there for several more hours.
Experts from Milwaukee’s Inspection Services Residential Code Enforcement were brought in to address whether or not the large, mobile hot dog could feasibly have been thrown down your mom’s hallway. Despite some sagging and a musty smell coming from the basement, experts informed the press everything was up to code.
When pressed on the issue, Mayor Johnson sought to assure the public that there is no need for alarm. “The weight of evidence suggests your mom is getting stuffed like a delicious, all-American Oscar Mayer hotdog as we speak,” assured Johnson. “However, there is no reason to believe the Weinermobile will continue to pile drive meat across our city.”
There is growing speculation that the Weinermobile may move on to your girlfriend’s apartment. Follow WNT for updates as this story unfolds.