Northland College Poised to Become World’s Largest Spirit Halloween
ASHLAND – After weeks of speculation and public humiliation, Northland College’s Board of Trustees have proudly announced their transition plan. Northland College will be converted in to the world’s largest Spirit Halloween.
Northland’s board of trustees finally admitted in early march that the school was facing a major budgetary shortfall, and had until April 3 to raise $12 million. As of April 5, the school had fallen well short, with donations amounting to less than $1.5 million. After their long, slow slide into insolvency, the Board chose to pivot to a business-oriented alternative.
Bed Tristol, Chair of the Board, sounded optimistic about Northland’s outlook when speaking with WNT. “Our short-sighted, self-serving approach to financial mismanagement has fallen out of touch with the region’s needs. Wisconsin’s north shore is screaming out for more seasonal retail options and we are ideally positioned to capitalize on that need” said Bristol. “We’ll be forsaking our existing students and converting the entire campus to a Spirit Halloween before October of this year.”
An unknown number of currently enrolled students will be left without degrees when the school closes this year. Here again, the Board of Trustees are alarmingly optimistic. A Northland Spokesperson told WNT, “Students who are leaving Northland without a degree because we betrayed them are stepping into a dynamic job market with abundant local opportunities. The students we’re leaving behind can get paid to board up our vacant buildings, or chase gulls off of our local beaches. Many of our top students will stay on as staff when we convert to Spirit Halloween.”
Follow WNT for updates on the ex-college’s progress.
