‘I’ve Got All My Christmas Shopping Done Already’ Insists Asshole Grandma

MILWAUKEE, WI- If we’re known for anything at Wisconsin News Today, it sure isn’t punctuality. So it’s easy to imagine that this reporter doesn’t do any of his Christmas shopping until a day or two before the holiday. Hell, I don’t even get a tree until the day before to cash in on those ‘Just get it out of here’ savings. 

In stark parallel to my own actions, when visiting my Grandmother this past weekend, she casually informed me over dinner that she had got all her Christmas shopping done already. She explained the various methods of which she acquired said gifts in what appeared to be an obvious attack on my character. Whether it was religious coupon cutting or black friday deals, I had heard enough. 

It’s candles for you again this year Memaw.