Wisconsin Government Orders Statewide Emergency Cheese Fondue Preparedness Drills

MADISON – Wisconsin is a place that takes its cheese seriously. According to sources within the government, things are about to get a lot more serious. Emergency Cheese Fondue Preparedness Drills or ECFPD are drills designed to prepare residents for any potential cheese-related emergencies that may occur in the future.

“We take cheese very seriously in Wisconsin,” said Governor Tony Evers in a press conference on Tuesday. “And we want to make sure that our residents are ready for anything, whether it’s a sudden shortage of cheese or a catastrophic fondue meltdown.”

Residents will be instructed on how to properly handle such emergencies, including how to safely dispose of excess cheese and how to improvise makeshift cheese-fondue utensils in the event of an emergency.

The emergency cheese fondue preparedness drills are set to begin next month, and residents are being urged to stock up on fondue forks and stool softeners.